Ok, this is a total Valentines Day must for me, ever since my gorgeous friend Jen introduced the concept to me, I have been hooked, and have whipped them up ever since.
Because what is sexier on Valentines Day than eating some hot ass cookies!?
Nothing.
Anywasted, they are an absolute blast to decorate with all your lushy girlfriends, and only get better looking the drunker you get.
Step 1: Roll out some store bought (or if you are a better person than me, some from scratch) sugar cookie dough.
Step 2: Using your heart shaped cookie cutter, cut out as many hearts as you can fit, re-roll left over dough, repeat.
Step 3: Using a knife (this step is reserved for the people not yet too tipsy to handle a weapon), cut the point off the bottom of each heart cookie.
Step 4: Bake as directed.
Step 5: Once cooled, pull out all your fun frosting accessories, and decorate!
Step 6: When they are all done, pull out your camera and proceed to take drunken obscene cookie pictures that only you will think are funny the next day as you scroll through your memory card with a total hangover, snickering at the shots of you accepting the dare to put glitter frosting on your real, non cookie ass, totally confused as to why the damn dog won’t leave you the fuck alone the next day.
These cookies are magical.
{ 41 comments… read them below or add one }
how cute are these?!
Those rock! I may have to try these. Knowing you..let me guess..no thongs because that would be less frosting to savor? That is why I wouldn’t at least!
These could be so appropriately inappropriate for so many occasions…
With these cookies, everyone is guaranteed to get a little piece of ass for Valentines!
These are hands down the most awesome V-day yummies I’ve ever seen!
OMG!!! I love those freaking cookies!!!
Of course my ass is MUCH smaller than any of those…
I had no idea you were so “crafty!” ; ) Love this idea!
SO CUTE.
I’m extremely impressed.
I stumbled accross your blog from thebloggess.com and added you to my blogroll…if you don’t mind. not that many visit my blog anyways. it’s new so i have an excuse…maybe…not the point.
ANYWAYS. I burst out laughing when i saw the cookies. I’m totally doing this and giving them to my single friends so they can have the laugh i did.
Love this!
I’m thinking these would be killer at a lingerie themed bridal shower!
Fucking RIOT! Those are a must.
Where are all the g-strings?! Kidding, i’d make mine all granny panties!
Those are adorable! I am totally making them!
LOVE these! If I wasn’t too old for my friends to get married, I’d make these for a bachelorette party!
Those are adorable. I want to make some.
OMG–how funny!
My disaster of a kitchen is your fault. And I don’t even hot sweet ass cookies to show for it.
awesome! I am totally making these next year!!!
Mmmmm… all foods are better when shaped like asses. Wait, what?
Tiffany took the words out of my mouth. I should make these for the single guys at work with that tag line-only piece of ass you’re getting tonight!
i want to bite your ass.
I loooove those cookies! What fun! I’m totally going to make those for my hubby! hillarious! Thanks for the inspiration! Really cute blog!
BEST VDAY COOKIES EVER!!!!!
I need to tell the world about these…..
What a cute idea. I think to complete the effect I’d take a bite out of each one before I gave them away. ; )
I am in love with these!
Genius, absolutely genius.
We went over to my MIL’s today. She made the heart cookies all up, and the kids got to decorate them. I couldn’t resist and turned one heart into some sweet cheeks.
I then tried to make some boobs. While my 6-year-old nephew was impressed, the MIL was not so much.
Those rock! And I LOVE your makeover!!!! You look great in pink!
These are awesome! Put’s new meaning into “sweet piece of ass!”
Oh man – I’m *SO* going to make these next year!!!
The cookies had me smiling, but the description of step 3 had me hitting the ‘subscribe’ button
These are fantastic! Plus, I already have a heart cookie cutter and a killer sugar cookie recipe. I am absolutely making these.
Sidenote: I noticed on twitter that you are a fellow NW Ohioan. Very cool to find another local blogger.
Hilarious! Thanks for the great post!
JKsMex comment5 ,
LOVE these – absolutely hilarious. And I must say, really well decorated if there was alcohol involved!
I’d eat a hot ass cookie.
Hot Valentine’s asses. Excellent idea. Love this post, Sugar!
and where the heck were my sweet cheek cookies today? Damn it woman, you invite me into your home and don’t share the goods. I don’t know if we can be friends anymore.
OMG. I love these. Great idea. so cute!
Oh the awesomeness. I am going to get the ingredients tomorrow and bake them with the girls. Does that make me a bad mom? Bear with me, they are on vacation and I need stuff to keep them entertained.